As Valentine’s Day approaches, red roses, heart-shaped balloons and curated couple selfies begin to flood social media feeds and shopping malls alike. Restaurants unveil “couple packages,” florists hike their prices, and love songs dominate the airwaves. Yet beneath this romantic spectacle lies a forgotten population: Valentine orphans. These are Kenyans who, for one reason or another, will watch February 14, pass like any other day, often feeling a quiet ache for what they do not have. Here are 10 types of Valentine orphans.

1. The side chick

She suffers in silence, receiving promises instead of plans. While her partner posts “my forever” captions with the official girlfriend, she is quietly told to “understand the situation.” Her Valentine’s gift will likely be a late-night call or a discreet Sh1,000 mobile transfer, and the message deleted.

2. The recently dumped

She was in love on January 31, single by February 10. The breakup, often sudden and poorly explained, is strategically timed to avoid Valentine expenses. She spends the day replaying old chats and stalking Instagram stories, wondering what went wrong, while the reality was that the man dumped her to avoid costs related to valentine.

3. The single-by-force

She is ready to love, willing to commit, but destiny refuses to cooperate. Dating apps yield ghosters, “talking stages” collapse mysteriously, and introductions never progress past “we shall talk.” She has even visited renowned preachers and prophets for a spiritual breakthrough to no avail. Her four children from different fathers make her dating situation even more complicated. Valentine’s Day only amplifies her loneliness.

4. The broke partner

Love exists, but money is missing. Inflation, rent, school fees and loan apps have completely drained her partner. Mr John will avoid calls on Valentine’s Day, fearing expectations he cannot meet. In fact, he may put his phone on flight mode or switch it off completely. She will pretend to understand when he finally claims there was no electricity, but disappointment hangs in the air.

5. The long-distance relationship victim

Her partner lives in another town or even majuu. Video calls replace hugs, and emojis replace flowers. Time zones and poor internet connections ruin romantic plans. Valentine’s Day feels like a cruel reminder of physical absence. She envies those walking in pairs, in red dresses, while she lives only in fantasy.

6. The secret relationship holder

He is in love, but the relationship is hidden. Parents disapprove, exes are unresolved, or the partner insists on “privacy.” Until the day she is okay with it, he cannot post photos, tag locations, or celebrate publicly. Valentine becomes a day of secrecy and coded messages.

7. The married, but emotionally single

Hers is a toxic marriage; they share a house but not affection. Romance disappeared years ago, replaced by routine, children and unresolved conflicts. Valentine’s Day will pass without gifts or acknowledgment, reminding her that marriage does not guarantee companionship. Her husband will not want anything to do with Valentine.

8. The Gen Z heartbreak survivor 

Fresh from campus love gone wrong, he trusted too fast and loved too hard. Screenshots, leaked chats, and public humiliation are part of his story. Valentine’s Day triggers emotional flashbacks and renewed distrust of love. As such, he will not have anything to do with mshikaji.

9. The religious abstainer

By choice or conviction, he does not celebrate Valentine’s Day. In fact, he views it as a commercialised, ungodly, or unnecessary event. Still, seeing couples celebrate can test his resolve, even as he insists he is content and focused on a higher purpose, away from Valentine love shenanigans.

10. The anti-Valentine philosopher

He claims Valentine’s Day is a scam created by business enthusiasts. He mocks couples online, posts sarcastic statuses, and pretends not to care about the day. He insists he cannot be swindled by women in the name of Valentine and retreats to an imaginary men’s conference. He will later resurface when the hullabaloo is over. Whether heartbroken, solitary by circumstance, or deliberately abstaining, Valentine orphans inhabit a parallel reality amid the red roses and love songs.