Five red flags men should never ignore

Two people you can’t advise, they say, are a woman who is madly in love and a man with money. But have you ever tried advising a man who has fallen head over heels for a woman? Do they listen? Talk about the proverbial red flags. Men tend to ignore the red flags all the time. The human heart is complicated, especially when one is in love.

Women have been assuming wifey roles since we got here. But we also have men who play serious husband roles to girls they will never marry. Red flags are always visible from day one, but a man will focus on the few positives and hope for the best.

It is not easy to understand a woman. She will be with you, cooking, washing your dirty jeans and scrubbing your bathroom yet her heart is somewhere else. She can stay with you for convenience, status and financial stability as she looks out for her dream man. Even if she appears to have laid down her life for you, she may wake up one day and leave.

Red flag number one

You’ve been together for a while and seen each other for almost all the weekends of the year. You’ve planned and joked about having three children. You have even suggested beautiful Zulu names for them. But the woman isn’t ready to have kids, six years and three months down the line. No good reason. She just is not ready! Listen, Benjamin, it’s not that she doesn’t want kids. She doesn’t want them with you! She’ll convince you to use protection or if not, she’ll be swallowing P2 like groundnuts or, will get herself on a long-term birth control method.

Red flag number two

Babe fully depends on you financially. Even on small things she should work out on herself, she won’t spend a coin from her pocket. She’ll text you to buy a toilet paper roll worth Sh40. A woman who sees potential in a man works hard for her little cash and wouldn’t leave all the bills to him. The moment you realize she’s asking you for everything and is not keen on saving or cutting down costs know that she’s not for keeps. She pegs her life on material things and doesn’t care about what you think of her. She wouldn’t mind draining you.

Red flag number three

The girl is not excited about your relationship and hasn’t introduced you to her girl gang, colleague or favourite sister. We all know that a woman in love is always excited about it and will mention it to one or two of her favourite peeps. She would want to meet her man’s buddies too. But if she talks of a small circle of friends who are introverts and don’t like meeting people or tells you she prefers her relationship private, it’s a red flag.

Red flag number four

Agatha plays too nice to you and everyone around you but doesn’t want commitment. If you propose marriage, she says you are not financially stable to start a family and other short stories. If there’s expensive treats she enjoys, she will stay for the fine things but will be available out here looking for the love of her life. It’s called dating for convenience and financial stability. Ogopa sana.

Red flag number five

Mpoa wako has a bunch of friends of the opposite sex, hangs out with them and one or two are her besties. She has a Brayo who checks on her every other time. Whenever you express concern over their closeness she says you are insecure. When you have a hiccup in your relationship, she tells it to Kevo who even takes her out for booze and chom to calm her down. Listen bro, your assistant is within the bestie-zone. That friend is her potential husband, she’s just waiting for the right time to take things to the next level.